You Inspire Me
by Loveedith
Summary: The first Edith/Bertie story? Edith is thinking back on her life after a job well done. The second chapter is from Bertie's point of view.
1. A Job Well Done

The night was over. A night that Edith had spent with a man - her Granny would be scandalised if she knew. But she would have no reason to - Edith and Bertie had spent the night together, but not in the way people usually think of when a man and a woman are said to have spent a night together.

Now they were sitting together on the sofas, happy but tired. Satisfied in the way you are after a job well done.

It was then that he uttered those words - "You inspire me".

Edith was happily surprised. Bertie wasn't really flirting with her, well at least not the way Michael had done it from day one. But they had worked very well together, and Bertie had helped her to solve things she found difficult with his calm common sense. The night had been wonderful. He was a nice and thoughtful person, and helpful, and she felt comfortable in his presence.

This would probably lead to nothing, but she found herself slowly starting to fall in love with him. He was a nice man. He was handsome too. She wouldn't mind seeing more of him. A lot more.

...

"I spent the night with Bertie Pelham and it was wonderful", Edith imagined herself saying at tomorrow's dinner at Downton. That probably would make even Mary listen to her. It wouldn't be a lie, but she knew she couldn't say a thing like that anyway.

...

She thought back about the men in her life - first Patrick, who was destined to marry Mary, who didn't care at all about him. Truth be told Patrick cared just as little about Edith as Mary cared about Patrick. Edith had still been devastated when he died, but of course she knew she would never have had a chance anyhow.

...

Then there was Sir Anthony - the man who had chosen Edith over Mary - the only man ever to do that. She had loved him and he had loved her back, at least she had thought so. It had been wonderful, but in the end he had left her in the most humiliating way possible.

She still didn't know what had made him do that. It had been difficult for her to trust anyone after that.

...

Then there was Michael Gregson. The man who had flirted with her from the very start. The man who had made her so disappointed when she found out he was married. The man who had disappeared in Germany. The man who had died there more than a year later. Edith had no idea what he had done all those months in between, perhaps she would never find out.

Michael Gregson wasn't a very honest man it seemed. But she had a lot to thank him for. Her flat, her magazine, her independence. And most of all her Marigold.

...

All those men where in the past now. Perhaps she hadn't learnt anything at all from meeting them. Perhaps she was just letting herself in for a new disappointment when she sat there smiling at that sweet and helpful man.

Because things were complicated. Even if they got to know each other better, there was always Marigold. If they got closer she had to tell him about Marigold being her own daughter, and then he would probably lose interest. But there was no way she could part from Marigold. If she had learnt nothing from life, she had at least learnt that. She needed Marigold just as much as Marigold needed her.

Probably more, although it was hard to admit.

...

"You inspire me", Bertie said with a tired but happy smile.

"Not many people would say that", Edith said, always ready to belittle herself.

"That is because they don't know you!"

Edith felt her heart flutter in an all too familiar way. She hoped it wouldn't lead to more heartbreak this time.

* * *

AN: Thank you for reading! Please leave a comment! The OC is Herbert Pelham, of course, I can't find him in the character list.

...

I like Bertie since the CS:5 and am glad to see that he is - still - just as nice as he was there. Or perhaps even nicer. I have been an Anthony/Edith fan for many years, as you perhaps know, in a way I still am. I feel sorry for Anthony, but at least I want Edith to be happy. Just like Anthony would.

I never cared much for Gregson, I still think he was a bad guy telling Edith he was happy she wasn't married, while not mentioning the fact that he himself was. And I'm sure he knew that Edith had been jilted - it must have been the big scandal that year and he was editing a society magazine. If he didn't know about that he was very bad at his job.

But Gregson did give Edith Marigold - which to begin with seemed to be the worst thing he did. And she did inherit him, which made her more independent, which was of course good also.

...

I hope that Bertie won't jilt Edith - I'm a little bit worried about the wedding program that has been found. They often do such things on purpose - the pictures of a healthy Sybil with her baby, the pictures of Edith and Anthony in front of the altar - to lure us to believe that all is going to go well.

But perhaps JF only wants to surprise us by letting Edith get happily married while Mary remains a widow - Mary says something about preferring to be alone to marrying the wrong man, which seems like a hint in that direction.


	2. A Relief

"I suppose you've guessed how much I like you?"

The words kept echoing in Bertie's brain the whole evening. He had kissed Lady Edith, he had dined with her and now they were dancing the night away. It was such a wonder, just holding her in his arms while the music was playing. He felt dissy and happy and shy and bold. He was happy that he had told her he was thinking of her constantly when they were apart. He was really thinking of her constantly _both_ when they were together and when they were apart.

He _loved_ her. _Like_ was not a strong enough word for his feelings. He _loved_ her.

...

"You have a lot to offer, but I'm not sure I'm worthy of it." That, or something like that, was what she had said.

He had wondered a little about it, but of course it was pretty obvious. Lady Edith had been the mistress of her late editor. He wouldn't have let her inherit his flat and The Sketch if he hadn't been her lover. Everyone with a brain could see that.

Bertie didn't mind that at all. Edith was over thirthy, he could hardly expect her to be a virgin. He wasn't one himself, for heavens sake. And he even prefered her not to be, it would all be easier if she knew what it was all about. When they were married...

He loved her so madly. For the first time in his life he was seriously considering getting married.

...

When they were back at Edith's flat, Bertie politely said no to the coffey. He wasn't going to push his luck any further right now, she meant far too much to him.

But he gave her a kiss before he left. And this time he managed to get it right.

Because when their kiss was over, and just before he turned around and left her, he looked deeply into her eyes and said:

"I _love_ you Edith. I do love you so much."

* * *

AN: Thank you for reading! Thank you for all the nice reviews to last chapter! Please tell me what you think about this one!

...

I like Bertie most of Edith's three men. (Up until 6:5 that is, I don't know what will happen next.)

Anthony was thinking only of Edith. He even jilted her, giving up all his own wishes, because he thought it was best for her. (Wrongly, of course!)

Gregson was thinking only of himself, pushing forward without telling her he was married and making her pregnant just before he left her. The only nice thing he did was to let her inherit him. Which didn't cost him anything at all, of course, because it wouldn't happen until he was dead.

But Bertie thinks about _both_ himself and Edith. He is anxious for her to like him, he wants to be with her. He is a bit shy around her, fearing she won't love him the way he loves her, but he still can't help 'pushing his luck'.

...

Yes, I will finish my Edith/Anthony stories too! But perhaps not until Downton is over. I'm too much in a Edith/Bertie mood now to do them justice.


End file.
